On the grounds that function and form are heavily intertwined, I’ve made some changes. They sound really minor and somewhat silly, but, on the basis that my environment is more than somewhat reflective of my state of being, they are necessary.
I am a great one for piles. No, not that sort of piles, but the ones comprising of a number of similar objects layered one upon another into a towering and distinctly unstable edifice. They are everywhere. Piles of paper, books, dvds, cds, console games, clothes, magazines, washing, washing up, etcetera, etc.
So I got rid of them; tidied them away, found their various places and put them neatly into them. And do I feel better for it? Very much so.
Sure, there is still the odd pile of books (okay, four of them) but that is a space issue. Everything else is tidy and pristine and lovely.
The next step is to get rid of stuff, to de-clutter and regurgitate up all that stuff hidden away in corners and cupboards and drawers. All that unnecessary stuff. And I think I’ll feel better for that too.
***
In three weeks time I run the Forest of Dean Half-marathon. I haven’t run in the last three weeks, and only a little in the last three months. I don’t have the mojo for it. I can’t seem to get out of the door with my running shoes on.
I don’t want to not run the FoD Half, it is an event I very much enjoyed last year and have managed to persuade a couple of people to do it this year. It is great fun, has a great atmosphere, and the views are, well, great.
So this evening it will be on with the shoes and shorts and things, and I will be out for a run. It will hurt. I know it will. Any residual fitness will be sorely tested and the weight gains will slow me down and make things harder. But they will be more painful and much harder on the 1st of April if I don’t deal with them now.
***
Twitter is difficult at the moment. I feel as though I am very much estranged from it, or rather, my various groups of friends on it. I’m not sure why. After three years it almost feels like I have nothing to say, nothing interesting or fun, but then, well, I don’t know…
It is like being at a big dinner party, with all these conversations going on around you, whilst you sit in a pocket of separateness, at once removed. Unlike that situation, where you can simply lean forward, smile, and engage in that non-verbal dance of introduction and interest, Twitter doesn’t allow that. You are either saying something, or are silent and non-participatory.
***
The writing, on the other hand, isn’t going too badly, which is a surprise. The WiP is a thing of fun, and I am enjoying writing it, even if it is a little difficult to work out in places. The joys of writing in both the first person and third person I guess.
I think that the urge to go away and write can be very different from the urge to socialise. And different batteries need charging sometimes.
Sounds like your going away into your cave to create for a bit. Look forward to seeing what comes out!
Hi Jose – i’m in a similar space to you, funnily enough. I’ve been feeling disconnected from my online ‘world’ and also strangely lethargic. Seems to be picking up now though and i’m hoping it’s ‘just one of those things’*. I think there is a honeymoon phase with every new person/thing in your life and i know i had that with Twitter but it has well and truly passed. Also, the problem with online relationships is the very thing that makes them inviting to begin with – it’s so easy to drop in and out of them.
*Technical term