This month has been a total washout in the running department. I signed up for four events, failed to do two of them and now won't be able to do the third in a couple of weeks, mostly due to lack of training and partly to do with cracking my ribs.
It has been quite hard to pinpoint why I've fallen out of the groove with running. I do still love it, but I just don't have the oomph / get up and go / enthusiasm for it. It has been months since I ran seriously, and many more since I trained seriously. And that isn't good.
Today was the Bristol 10K and a number of my friends were running it. I joined EF on the CLIC Sargent bus to cheer everyone one (not the easiest of things with very sore ribs) and, well, I felt the buzz. Part of that was the atmosphere (and the CLIC lot are good at atmosphere), part of it was the crowds, and a good chunk of it was watching the runners go past. It was particularly lovely to see Matt, Joanne and Ramon run past, each of them overcoming personal circumstance to be there, each of them looking comfortable and happy.
It was great. I am so proud of them, and am proud to know them and see them do it. The only way,it could have been better is if I had run it with them.
I have five months to go from 0 miles to 26. Not impossible, but a challenge regardless. Some of those weeks will be spent recovering from this injury, but I think I can do it.
I can but try. I want to run again. I want that weirdly painful / effortless / floaty feeling of when the miles no longer matter and you are simply just running. I miss it. I miss the challenge and the joy.
It is time to go on the run again. It is time for mantras and stubbornness. It is time for positive thoughts and being all about the run.
After all, in my world, it used to be all about the run. And it can be once again.